White People

I like Y’all. Y’all made me a multimillionaire. Stupid. Nah, just kidding. Heh.

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Hillary Clinton

She about her money. I’m about my money. But, you know, she brought out that old broad Geraldine Ferrari, or whatever her name is, look like Paul McCartney, and she said some wild shit, but she right, because white people just like to be down with Black people, I mean, look at me. Most of my fans are White, right? Most people buying my music is White, forget what that fool over at that Stuff White People Like blog says, ain’t no White people listening to no Mos Def. Only about the 15 White people he see at his little job or whatever. White people like Fiddy. White people ain’t trying to be down with no half Blacks, they want dark Black street black ghetto bustin mad caps murkin niggas Black.

When it comes right down to it, White people would rather see someone like me succeed than that Obama nigga because they can understand it, a brotha like me doin’ it big makin’ records and shit. But Obama? Shit, he got them too confused.

Turkey Legs

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Fuck you laughin’ at? Turkey is good.

Masterpiece Theatre

Baby Oil

50 Cent